It's been a while since I've been here. I stumbled into this quote and just loved it. I suppose, because, it has a huge application here...
As Upton Sinclair put it, “It is difficult to get a man to understand something when his salary depends upon his not understanding it.”
If I substitute the word "salary" for "emotional survival" this quote becomes even more operative. Because, that in fact, is what prevents most people (at least those I work with) from having the life that they desire.
Let's suppose for an instant, that you acquired a belief that said, "All rich people suck. They exploit the working class." Is this always true? Of course not, and your hidden belief system would prevent and limit you from enjoying relationships with people whom qualify under your belief system as "rich."
Now let's bring this to a different level. Let's suppose that you are completely ego identified with being "smart." You have a belief system that says, "I am smarter than most people. I get better grades and I know things that others do not." So as you march that belief system into the world, you adamantly oppose anyone that does not agree with you. In your mind, you are vastly superior to those you mingle with. So you either choose to engage or disengage with them based on some foolish belief system that is fragile and simply not true. I mean if you are "smarter" tha everyone else, aren't you always right? How could anyone possible disagree with me? You decide whether you like people or dislike people based on nothing other than "whether they agree with you or not."
That is insane. It is that type of insanity that I sought to remove when I began this blog. Why? Because it prevents me from loving all types of people.
Emotional freedom means including all people and celebrating differences. It is perfectly ok to do this. But if I am completely ego identified with being smarter than you, how can I possibly love you if you disagree with me? Or worse yet, what if I suspect that in fact- you may be smarter than me? Might I not fear you? Would my ego fear you? Of course it would.
And we know fear is the basis for all negative emotions. If we fear something we inherently dislike it, perhaps hate it. Divorce, bankruptcy, death.
Therefore, emotionally insecure people fear a lot of things. They fear those who do not agree with them and those silly and secret belief systems that they have acquired. And in the end, their emotional survival and thus successful relationships hinge almost entirely on Sinclair's quote. Let me re-write it Upton, I sincerely apologize.
It is difficult to get a man to understand something when his emotional survival depends upon his not understanding it.